29 Hilarious Uses For Sex Toys Around The House

29 Hilarious Uses For Sex Toys Around The House

We decided to put some sex toys to work around the house.

1. Fake Vagina Dish Towel Holder

Keeping those dish towels close by, but out of the way can be a tricky proposition. Thankfully we’ve found a tasteful and elegant solution with a tight grip to fit seamlessly with your kitchen.


2. Suction Cup Dildo Loo Roll Holder

Looking for a tasteful way to add some “je ne sais quoi” to your bathroom without spending a fortune? Hello Kitty toilet paper optional…


3. Ring Toss With Butt Plugs & Cock Rings

Your son may be begging for the latest video game console, but remind him that stretching your imagination is important as sometimes the simplest games are also the most pleasurable.


4. Dildo Door Stop

Say “No” to scuffs, scratches and unsightly scrapes with this unobtrusive door stop.


5. Butt Plug Juicer

A perfect way to start your day is with some freshly squeezed, organic orange juice.


Here it is in action!


6. Sex Doll Fashion Mannequin

Not sure what to wear tomorrow? Why not use a fashion mannequin to figure out what pieces work best together.


7. A Lousy Coat Hook

Unfortunately, some things don’t always work out as planned


8. Penis Extender Chair Leg Protectors

Save your floor from scratches and scuffs by using these colorful chair leg protectors.


9. Fake Vagina Pen Holder

Always have a pen at the ready to write down your deepest ideas.


10. Wrist Restraints Curtain Tieback

Lack of lighting can dampen the mood of most rooms. So use a good curtain tieback that will hold any curtain away from the window, no matter how much it struggles, fights and tries to get away…


11. Fake Vagina Cigarette Filter

While we’re anti smoking at the Bad Girl’s Bible, some people do enjoy a cigarette after sex.


12. Anal Bead Necklace

If you’re on a budget and don’t want to drop more money on jewelry, then it’s time to improvise…

13. Giant Dildo Bookend

“A cluttered house is a cluttered mind”, that’s a phrase that’s so salient. So make sure to use a big, heavy bookend to keep your books tightly & firmly in place.


14. Nipple Clamp Glasses Necklace

Hands up if you ever have trouble finding your glasses! It happens to the best of us, but it doesn’t need to happen anymore with an adjustable glasses holder necklace


15. Pocket Pussy Beer Koozie/Stubby Holder

Nothing beats a cold, refreshing beverage on a hot summers day. Keep it cool with this simple tip


16. Penis Sleeve Sports Grips

A firm grip on your tennis racket or golf club ensures great ball control. The same can be said when you’re swinging for that shuttle cock.


17. Suction Cup Dildo Fridge Handles

It’s frustrating when the handle on your fridge breaks off. Even worse when the second one breaks too! Thankfully there is a stylish solution for opening and closing your fridge.


18. Butt Plug Wine Stopper

You’ll never need to worry about your wine spoiling again with this playful wine stopper.


19. Fake Vagina Headrest

Sitting for long periods without good neck and head support is silly if you care about your health. Thankfully this headrest makes your head & neck feel like they’re trapped between a little bit of heaven.



20. Double Ball Gag Ear Defenders

Working in loud, noisy environments can do long term damage to your hearing. Stay safe and keep things quiet with these opulent ear defenders.


21. Nipple Clamp Photo Holders

Hang your memories on the wall to remind yourself of times past.


22. Butt Plug Sink Plug

Sink plugs always seem to disappear without a trace. Now you have a back up plan.


23. Knuckle Duster Dildo Cable Organizer

No matter what you do, your headphones cables are going to get tangled with the rest of your computer cables…unless you take some aggressive action with a cable organizer.


24. Giant Dildo Lamp Base

After you choose a style of lamp you find attractive, make sure to check that it has a sturdy base.


25. Penis Extender Umbrella Handle

The last thing you want to let go of when there is a downpour is your umbrella. The right grip is essential if you don’t want to get your hair wet.


26. Lube Launcher Shot Glasses

Here’s a fun new way to get socially lubricated.


27. Rubber Fist Letter Holder

Organizing your mail just got a little easier thanks to this punchy mail holder.


28. Penis Pump Plunger

While the rest of these ideas are fun, this penis pump is just incredibly useful if you have a blocked sink or drain. It just sucks everything out of it. I’m totally serious by the way!


29. Rubber Fist Jewelry Model

Get jewelry inspiration and discover what fits best.


30. Penis Sleeve Car Customizations

All you ricers out there are gonna love the latest accessories to make your car look ridiculous.


If you enjoyed my tips in this article but want a true sex masterclass, then you may be interested in watching this blow job tutorial video where you’ll learn my most powerful techniques & tips for giving your man incredible oral sex. Enjoy!

29 Bizarre Life Hacks With…Sex Toys


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